| recent comments mjp said: I'm, uh, working on it. Right now. ~ Fly me to the moon, then blow that shit up! shane said: michael phillips,you are a fuckin madman,post yer next story... ~ Fly me to the moon, then blow that shit up! mjp said: Yes, that is a potential problem for people in 10,001. I often worry about... ~ Doctor, it hurts when I move my arm like this... damian said: indeed. ~ Doctor, it hurts when I move my arm like this... Scott h Florance said: The Christians believe Jesus Christ tis immortal and he lives forever. It is... ~ Doctor, it hurts when I move my arm like this... mjp said: Isn't there a NASCAR or gun or fishing or tabakky-chewing site you can go... ~ I can see for miles, but it's kind of blurry up ahead Andrew Olin Jones said: Hillbilly said you might turn off the smog but I don't want you to do that... ~ I can see for miles, but it's kind of blurry up ahead mjp said: My childhood box? I don't think anyone wants to open that... ~ Fly me to the moon, then blow that shit up!   previous ramblings • I can see for miles, but it's kind of blurry up ahead 2.18.08 • Simple is as simple does 1.31.08 • I feel the earthworms under my feet 1.22.08 • New boots and panties 1.19.08 • I haven't given up, I've just stopped trying 12.25.07 • I don't pray. Kneeling bags my nylons. 12.20.07 • So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, good night 9.19.07 • Grab the closet case by the horns 8.11.07 • Blogged down in the forum of my youth 5.23.07 • Hotter than July 5.16.07 • 26 Miles Across the Deep Blue Sea 5.11.07 • A rose by any other name, still doesn't smell so good 4.6.07 • Children of a lesser dog from hell 2.22.07 • Squid lights 1.9.07 • Cats and dogs 12.19.06 • Mission accomplished! 11.22.06 • Various tidbits of marginal interest to anyone 11.9.06 • Buddy, can you spare a town? 10.16.06 • A garbage can is somewhat precise. 10.6.06 • Another cantankerous rant - surprise! 9.25.06 • Hey, where you been? 9.1.06 • Geeeeeeee mail, @smog.net 7.27.06 • Oh good lord, it's a kid's show 7.22.06 • Sleeping dogs 6.28.06 • Dumb and dumber 6.21.06 • HDTV for $150! 5.16.06 • Thank you for calling the White House. My name is Krishna, how may I be providing you excellent service today? 4.28.06 • Decades and bits of centuries 4.24.06 • Secret Society 3.22.06 • Sometimes I don't speak right, but yet I know what I'm talking about 3.20.06 • This is the modern world 3.15.06 • Shakespeare never did this 2.18.06 • Who is Lonnie Tolliver, and why should you care? 1.27.06 • Scuttlebutt and innuendo 1.16.06 • Beware the fury of a patient man 1.6.06 • I feel 100 pounds lighter already... 12.30.05 • Dude! Your wiki is showing... 12.20.05 • Yeti spotted, film at 11! 12.19.05 • "God is a concept by which we measure our pain." 12.9.05 • Doctor, it hurts when I move my arm like this... 12.8.05 • Hey, what's with the torn up clothes, and didn't you have a shag haircut last week? 12.5.05 • Shameless self-promotion or a desperate cry for love? You decide. 11.18.05 • Further proof that drinking will kill you 11.6.05 • Big Apple dreamin' on a wooden floor 11.1.05 • Happy birthday to smog. Now where's my cake? 10.16.05 • I got nothing 10.4.05 • free within my own doom 9.25.05 • A Rambling Essay on Politics and the Bleeding Life Written While Drinking a Six-Pack (Tall) 9.12.05 • (There's Gonna Be A) Showdown 8.31.05 • Well, could I have her spam instead of the baked beans then? 8.28.05 • What has four wheels and flies? 8.21.05 • Don't think twice, it's all right 8.13.05 • My ass is getting cold sitting on this glacier... 8.11.05 • Capital radio 8.11.05 • nobody's fault 7.23.05 • secret santa 7.3.05 • everything we touch turns to rust 6.21.05 • on the edge of seventeen 6.13.05 • life at 300 baud 6.9.05 • 12 steps away from the screen, running 6.5.05 • shake a leg 6.5.05 • san pedro anarchy press, Inc. 5.22.05 • Z is for zealot 5.20.05 • Lenny Bruce was right 5.16.05 • bad meat in the can 5.12.05 • it's in the water 5.12.05 • you tell me 5.10.05 • what matters most is how well you're lit 5.5.05 • just keep pulling the handle, it'll all be over soon 5.3.05 • rust never sleeps 4.24.05 • randomness, chaos and deliverance 4.21.05 • baby was a black sheep, baby was a whore 4.20.05 • Kill my boss? Do I dare live out the American dream? 4.16.05 • roses are red, violets are blue, i thought my hell had ended, but the devil is a crafty bastard with a sick sense of humor and a mean streak a mile wide 4.14.05 • rock the cash bar 4.12.05 • many rivers to cross 4.10.05 • imitation is the sincerest form of unoriginality 4.8.05 • if you are the big tree, we are the small axe! 4.8.05 • give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine 4.4.05 • and who the hell figured QWERTY was a good idea? 4.4.05 • your pope was nothing compared to this guy! 4.3.05 • you've got a TV...i've got a TV...we've all got TV's... 3.29.05 • hitler painted roses 3.26.05 • counselor 3.25.05 • she's still here, damn it! 3.21.05 • patience is a virtue, but resignation is for suckers. 3.13.05 • should have taken mom up on those violin lessons... 3.9.05 • last night a dj saved my life! yeah, maaaaan! 3.9.05 • if i had a hammer... 3.8.05 • caveman re-invents the wheel! film at 11. 3.7.05 • he's mad as hell, and he's not going to take it anymore! 3.4.05 • this is a public service announcement - with guitar! 3.2.05 • battlefield girth 2.28.05 • never give a media giant an even break 2.25.05 • 10 Things I've done that you haven't 2.24.05 • come back, bastard! 2.23.05 • hey, just because he likes Judy Garland records and the Tony awards doesn't necessarily mean anything... 2.23.05 • "I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me." 2.21.05 • I couldn't say it if it wasn't true 2.17.05 • The demons begged Jesus, "If you drive us out, send us into the herd of pigs." 2.11.05 • how to lose 10 pounds in five minutes! 2.6.05 • earth to smog, earth to smog 2.5.05 • my own private chernobyl... 2.2.05 • Estoy solo, pero siento que tu estas conmigo. 1.26.05 • confessions of an obsessive freak of nature 1.5.05 • death wants more death 12.30.04 • every mikkle make a muckle (ask a Jamaican what it means) 12.17.04 • things that don't suck 12.15.04 • what's it all about, mjp? 11.11.04 • old dog, new tricks 9.2.04 • if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all 8.15.04 • Frida Kahlo, Charles Bukowski and Joel-Peter Witkin have left the building 2.13.03 • R.I.P. smog.net 5.19.04 • almost cut my hair...it happened just the other day 4.23.04 • and we're back! 4.22.04 • one cocoa full a basket 2.14.04 • let's get ready to rumble 1.24.04 • brace yourself for a shitstorm 1.6.04 • it's my party, i'll o.d. if i want to 12.6.03 • pimp-a-licious 11.27.03 • on a clear day you can see the 18th century 11.9.03 • men are from mars, women are from vegas 10.14.03 • hit and run walker 10.6.03 • It's all cow, after all 10.2.03 • Johnny Cash is dead, Tower records is bankrupt, gawd save the fucking Queen. 9.13.03 • any history of mental illness? 9.10.03 • boggle: to hesitate as if in fear or doubt. 9.6.03 • pass the aspirin 8.27.03 • this is what i get for leaving the house 7.21.03 • safety in numbers 7.13.03 • god damn 7.11.03 • a million and one stupid things... 6.6.03 • praise Jeebus! 5.23.03 • Kennedy to John Lydon; "Oh, lighten up!" 5.20.03 • they say the French are cowards and assholes... 5.2.03 • I couldn't possibly be *that* fat! 4.19.03 • what's so funny 'bout peace love and understanding? 3.22.03 • this skunk's for you 3.12.03 • Monday's coming like a jail on wheels 2.24.03 • linux, linus, lomax, duck! 2.20.03 • FREE MICHAEL JACKSON! 2.18.03 • the weather in Los Angeles is cloudy 2.13.03 ©1995-2008 mjp | patience is a virtue, but resignation is for suckers. Sunday, March 13th 2005 i sent a guy named bryan hutcheson 250 copies of my "still no sign of Osama bin Laden" poem for an Iraqi war-inspired "peace card set" almost two and a half years ago, and the set never materialized. the poem covered three 5x5 inch cards, and i hand printed those fuckers on the old letterpress, so that was a lot of time effort and materials, not to mention busting my ass to meet his submission deadline, which was november 1, 2002. if you don't know how letterpress works, each letter and space is a tiny piece of lead, and they all have to be fit together in an insane mathematical jigsaw puzzle where each line is exactly the same length. if you mess up, a whole line of type can fall out of the press and you basically have to start over. aside from that it's a very satisfying luddite activity, and a great way to print things that really look printed, as opposed to the norm now, which is stuff produced by computer.  anyway, over the years i've asked bryan hutcheson twice to have my work returned if the set wasn't coming out, then more recently i've asked twice to have my work returned whether the set was coming out or not. a couple of days ago (2 years, 4 months, and 9 days after sending him my work), i decided to give it another try and ask - again - for my work to be returned. the next day he sent a few paragraphs of complaints and excuses, including, "Quite honestly, I don't care how long it has taken to complete the project." and "FYI, sometimes projects like this can take years to complete. Hell, I've worked on records for punk bands that took 5 years to complete." and the reassuring, "you...will be receiving your boxsets soon." so now i have promises of delivery dating from 11/03, 5/04, and now 3/05. one a year. at least he's consistent. i don't know what to do with this guy. i know for a fact that i won't see these mythical card sets any time "soon." and obviously asking nicely for my work to be returned doesn't work. i'm nowhere near massachusetts, so i can't go knock on his door and take my work back, so my options are limited. i did save 19 sets of the poem (my printing overrun, which i'd normally destroy when working on a numbered set, but i'm glad i saved them this time), and i still have 15 of those. i numbered and signed them about a year ago when it started to become apparent that i'd never see the sets, and i've given a few away since then. but i still want what hutcheson promised, lo those many years ago. i'm entitled to that much, or more, after all this damned waiting. i guess i could put his contact information here, and tell anyone shopping for letterpress printing that his guy doesn't care much about deadlines and dates and all that bourgeois crap, and unless you have several years to wait for your product, you'd be better off going elsewhere... bryan hutcheson manifesto letterpress 116 pleasant street - 2245 easthampton, ma 01027 p/f:413.529.0009 http://www.manifestopress.com then, eventually, a search for this guy will lead people here, and they can decide for themselves whether they want to work with someone who doesn't seem to have any concept of time or the value of other people's work. or maybe it'll just get him more business... on Monday, March 14th 2005 at 2:00am, tbone said: is a printing press one of those keyboard-looking things with the ribbin inside? on Monday, March 14th 2005 at 2:00am, mjp said: yes. exactly. on Tuesday, March 15th 2005 at 2:00am, damian said: why don't you send me one of those sets MJP? huh? HUH?!? on Tuesday, March 15th 2005 at 2:00am, mjp said: hit that contact link over there to the left and send me your address chief. on Tuesday, March 15th 2005 at 2:00am, damian said: no shit!! really? sweetness.you're truly a gentleman, mjp - don't let anyone tell ya otherwise. on Wednesday, March 16th 2005 at 2:00am, Bryan Hutcheson said: MJP Failed to leave out a good portion of critical infromation regarding the Peace box set we have been working on. 1) many people that promised submissions never follwed through. While MJP may have managed to meet the deadline others did not. After much work, including printing and die-cutting the boxes, the project has finally reached comlpletion as of 03/15/05. The final touches have been put on the sheet which details all the contributors and their information. Sorry MJP has to be upset about this. AS FOR MEETING DEADLINES, ASK MY GROWING CLIENT BASE HOW I AM WITH DEADLINES. Michael, for someone who contributed to a peace set, your rant here smacks of blatant hostility. Let me rmind you that I have been producing this collection on my own tie, with materials I have paid for, and with many delays that were out of my control. Part of the reason this project has been delayed, also, is because the deadlines that have really mattered were the ones that MY CLIENTS require. Sorry to find such a vicious attack against me from you...almost makes me sad to thinkall thime time I have put into this project ends up with this crap from you. cheers, Bryan Hutceson on Thursday, March 17th 2005 at 2:00am, mjp said: i see how it is. now they're magically ready on 3/15. in the email it was "soon." but bryan, you've been saying "soon" for so long it's lost all meaning. this isn't the first time there's been a completion date. the last one was well over a year ago. you started the project, i didn't. you solicited work for it. had you told me it was going to take three years, i would have passed. speaking of blatant hostility, what do you call this? "Quite honestly, I don't care how long it has taken to complete the project." it amuses me though that you bring punk rock into your defense, while complaining that you are just too busy making money to finish the project. perhaps you can find some irony in that. i know i can. you're about as punk as a solid gold hummer. interesting that you found this in only three days. what are you doing, googling yourself? that's pretty punk too. you rock, dude. and dude - if you think that was a vicious attack, you really don't know me. that little dittie is calm and restrained. the first thing i typed really was vicious, but i scrapped it and put this comparatively dispassionate thing up in it's place. so as angry and snitty and whiny as you feel now, it could have been (and probably should have been) a lot worse. on Thursday, March 17th 2005 at 2:00am, Kit Dorbin said: I hope he hasn't been Googling himself. This is the #1 listing when you search for Bryan Hutcheson on Google. In three days? Wow. on Thursday, March 17th 2005 at 2:00am, bryan 'dude' hutcheson said: MJp sent me an email last night: It reads as follows: _____________________________ yeah, i know all about plugging away late at night. i was doing it back in 2002 to meet your deadline. nice try, but you can't put this on me. any hostility you meet with (and there was plenty from the other contributors i contacted) is brought on by your own actions. or inactions. mjp __________________________________ Actually I have been contacted by two of the other contributors and they are much more understanding than yourself. I assume your making it your personal mission to "get even" for some perceived notion you might have about the delays. Right now I am responsible for the salaries and health insurance of 3 employees. When I started this project, I was lucky to make my rent every month. You may have busted your ass to get me your contributions but others did not, I may be the easy target for your hostility, but I assure you, there is much more tot his story than your simple mind wants to accept. If you need a bad guy, I am certainly willing to be your place to dump your anger. MJP, have you stopped taken a medication recently or something? on Thursday, March 17th 2005 at 2:00am, Bryan Hutcheson said: Oh and yes I was googling myself. My girfriend and I were sitting around and decided to google oursleves. Is there a problem with that? We have been hand-cutting and assembling boxes over the last few months in our spare time, which has been in short supply for an entire year. I have been putting in 7 day weeks to meet deadlines for clients over the last year. Not sure how you equate making money with being anti-punk rock. I make money and support three employees, with a salary, benefits and soon, part ownership in the company. The thing that sucks about all this, MJP, is that you're presenting a so one-sided spin on this project...and you're doing it ina public forum too smear me. When the project ships, I have a feeling you'll be somewhat upset with yourself. Maybe you should be pissed at the contributor from Serbia who took almost a year to get me his printed work. His stuff is phenomenal and well worth the wait...or so I thought, before you decided to make this a pissing match. And as an FYI, including materials I have purchased, plates, paper, shipping costs and time spent here in the shop, my expenses on this thing are nearing $800 dollars. If I didn't have you listed on the contributors page, with pictures of your work printed, I'd pull yoour ungrateful ass out of the project. But that would cost me another $200 to have the information page reprinted. YOU'RE SO OFF-BASE HERE IT"S ALMOST SAD. on Thursday, March 17th 2005 at 2:00am, johnny cash machine said: hold on. did the project take 3 years or not? i think that, if true, speaks volumes. nuff said. on Thursday, March 17th 2005 at 2:00am, tbone said: haha - thanks for the laugh, bryan. really, i laughed my ass of at you. three fucking years to complete a project? give me a break. on Thursday, March 17th 2005 at 2:00am, tbone said: oh and in response to this being the top google hit, have yall looked at this guy's site? http://manifestoletterpress.com and http://manifestoletterpress.com/index2.html no wonder he's not even listed on google. hardly any text, "Untitled Document" as page titles. but damn - at least it has pretty graphics. on Thursday, March 17th 2005 at 2:00am, M.S. said: has this charming fellow ever read any of mjp? or even the poem that was submitted? if he had perhaps he wouldn't be so shocked at the *gasp!* cynical nature of his new-found-p.i.t.a. man, i hate the internet. may i suggest a peace project for the next 3 years: the worlds largest finger painting. on Thursday, March 17th 2005 at 2:00am, mjp said: amusing that you say that you wish you could "pull [my] ungrateful ass out of the project," when i've been asking you to do just that for a year and a half. three times i asked for my work to be returned, and three times you either ignored me or responded that it would be done "soon." "When the project ships, I have a feeling you'll be somewhat upset with yourself." oh, trust me, i'm already upset with myself. upset that i was foolish enough to cast my lot with someone who waves the "peace" flag and trots out a tenuous fringe association with punk in a pathetic attempt to curry favor and establish street cred, while he is actually no more than a thinly veiled fascist, and an oppressive, controlling prick. there, go type that into google with your girlfriend. on Friday, March 18th 2005 at 2:00am, JaMmY said: Wow this HUtcheson is a LOAD. You know theres people like that out there but you still can't believe it sometimes when you see it!! on Saturday, March 19th 2005 at 2:00am, Ed Joyce said: I think the article is very even-keeled considering the project has taken so long to complete. It looks like the article has lit a fire under Mr. Hutcheson and he finally intends to bring the product out. on Saturday, March 19th 2005 at 2:00am, mjp said: oh jesus...mouse over hutcheson's name on his second March 17 post...he listed his web site as http://mjptheungrateful.com/ i guess i should be grateful to him for holding my work hostage for three years. or maybe i should be grateful to him for finishing the project HE started and solicited work for. oh wait, he still hasn't done that... bryan, you really need to change the name of your booming business (with three employees and health insurance!) to THE BRYAN HUTCHESON HUBRIS PRESS AND GODHEAD. elect yourself pope and go beatify yourself. such astounding self-love shouldn't go unrewarded. on Sunday, March 20th 2005 at 2:00am, goodespeler said: is it just me or does mjptheungrateful.com actually sound like a cool domain name? you should register it and have it mirror smog. on Monday, March 21st 2005 at 2:00am, mjp said: it's just you. on Wednesday, March 23rd 2005 at 2:00am, Nate Cavanaugh said: Maybe he is waiting until Bin Laden is found to ship it out to you ;) Just for the record, this guy sounds like a complete and utter tool... on Thursday, April 14th 2005 at 12:55pm, sd said: bryan is bringing me to tears. i have yet to see a style of buck passing like this anywhere else. the simplest thing to have done with this is to, within the first year, return the shit you accepted for this project with a note saying 'it will take longer than expected for this to be produced. i'll let ya know as soon as we're set to move forward again' rather than hijacking someone's material until you can fit it in your busy schedule. i can only imagine what a busy day at the shop is like for this dink and his whopping number of staff. on Thursday, April 14th 2005 at 2:12pm, mjp said: note how Dr. Hutcheson said, "the project has finally reached comlpletion as of 03/15/05" on march 16th - a month ago. ask me how the sets look. go ahead, ask. "so, mjp, how do the sets look?" well, i'm glad you asked! i have no idea. they are still sitting in a dusty corner of "manifesto letterpress," somewhere in massachusetts. on Tuesday, January 10th 2006 at 11:35am, mjp said: In my post about receiving the sets I mentioned that it was draining to deal with a compulsive liar, and now reading over his comments here, you can see for yourself what I'm talking about. March 16th: "After much work, including printing and die-cutting the boxes..." March 17th: "We have been hand-cutting and assembling boxes..." Which is it, die-cutting or hand cutting? Answer: neither, because he was lying. Incidentally, the sets are not boxed at all, they are wrapped in a lightweight cardstock and surrounded by a paper band. It's a nice presentation, but no one would call it a box. "...the contributor from Serbia who took almost a year to get me his printed work. His stuff is phenomenal and well worth the wait..." No contributor from Serbia is included in the set. Maybe the work was so "phenomenal" Hutcheson kept it for himself. Or maybe he was lying. "If I didn't have you listed on the contributors page, with pictures of your work printed..." There is no "contributors page, with pictures of [the] work printed," just a card with a list of names and a URL -- http://peaceboxset.com -- which currently points to a site selling "Nantucket Knee Pants," whatever the fuck those are. I could go through three years of emails from Hutcheson and list a few dozen more lies here (at least a dozen in the last month alone), but really, no one would believe it. I know I wouldn't if I were you. Okay, I promise not to beat this dead horse any longer. I just re-read this for the first time in months and the die cut/hand cut contradiction jumped out at me. Carry on. on Thursday, April 6th 2006 at 9:31pm, BRYAN HUTCHESON said: Dude, you said you were going to pull this from your site after we sent you the sets... and th ebox of beer an mead...still it's here and your ranting on. as a side note. we diecut and scored the boxes from a large sheet on our Vandercook 219. We couldn't cut the sheet up to the edge of the parent sheet so we had to go back and finish the cut by trimming out to the edge of the sheet by hand. honestly, it does look like you're beating dead horse.... As for the site, we'll be be uploading some of the additional pages in the next few weeks. We're buried with work right now. .. Cheers and I hope you enjoy the boxset... on Friday, April 7th 2006 at 2:30pm, Melissa Sue said: what in holy hell is going on here? I think this post should stay up only for bryan's impeccable use of the word "dude". on Friday, April 7th 2006 at 6:58pm, mjp said: Dude! Can you, like, open your mouth, or work your two typing fingers without a lie coming out? I guess the "box of beer and mead" was lost by the post office. Oooorrrrr - you never sent it. Which is exactly what happened. I never said I would remove this. I said I would take the amazing Bryan Hutcheson clock off the main page, which I did. Everything I've said here is true. Why would I remove it? on Monday, April 10th 2006 at 3:04am, Hillbilly Jones said: Three years? Sweet Betsy Jesus. Even eighteen months is too frigging long, it seems. Judge Judy would have drenched B.H. with a water pistol full of cat diarrhea over procrastinating for THREE YEARS. ?Look at me when you talk!? she commands. ?And Mr. Hutcheson?HEY! I said to look at me when you talk to me?you should have finished the projects much earlier than three years instead of Googling yourself with your girlfriend, don?t you agree, Mr. Hutcheson?? ?W-w-w-well, Judge Judy,? he said, ?let me tell you what really happened, if I could ma'am.? ?Go ahead Mr. Hutcheson, but make it snappy!? ?It all started back when I was born. I was born naked and I just remember really liking my mommy?s titties and it just so happens that my girlfriend has two of them suckers too; both about the same size too or pretty close. Anyway, did I mention that I work 7 days a week?? ?Mr. Hutcheson. Do you hear me? I don?t believe you! You took too long to complete the project! GOT IT?!? ?B-b-b-but, Judge, you don?t understand.? he cried. Mjp stands at the podium patiently reading a newspaper. ?Understand what, Mr. Hutcheson?; that you don?t know it?s a pissing CONTEST; not a pissing MATCH. Where were you raised, Mr. Hutcheson? I can?t believe you called it a pissing MATCH. You?re REALLY irritating me now, Mr. Hutcheson.? ?M-M-M-Massachusetts, your honor.? ***Judge Judy cackles, throws her hair back like an old Marilyn Monroe with black hair and little skin tags hanging from her nipples. ?Massachusetts? Didn?t you see AN OFFICER AND A GENTLEMAN, Mr. Hutcheson? There?s only two things from Massachusetts: Steers and Queers! Any idiot should know that!? Bryan raises his hand and waves it back and forth, quickly, over his head as far as his arms will stretch. ?Although I have no evidence of any form of contract between the two of you, you still should have either completed the project, Mr. Hutcheson, or sent it all back to him with a dozen roses. That would have been THE RIGHT THING TO DO.? His arm pit takes on the look of a silent, open mouth gasping for Jesus as he waves his hand back and forth, like a cheerleader with two minutes left in the fourth quarter and his team is down by two points and the field goal kicker is warming up on the sidelines. ?Put your hand down, Mr. Hutcheson.? ?If you?ll just listen, Judge,? Bryan blurts, ?I can explain.? Judge Judy looks over and Burt, and snorts. ?OK. It all started back when I was born. I was naked, and my mom was really hot. I?m telling ya, she was hot. Did I mention that I might be part owner in a company? We might even put INC. after our name. It?s all very special. So that?s why, Judge.? Burt turns towards and looks over his glasses as Judge Judy gives him a squirrel shot of her musty blue panties. As Burt crosses his hands over his groin area to hide his woody, mjp raises his hand. ?You?re winning, Mr. P. Don?t fuck it up by saying anything! You got it?? ***mjp puts his hand down ?I?ve heard enough,? says Judge Judy, ?I cannot award you monetary damages but I will award you your property. Next time, either have a contract or be very clear from the start.? ?Thank you Judge Judy,? says mjp. ?And I won?t award you $800, Mr. Hutcheson, in your counter suit. You have no proof, and besides, you?re either a steer or a queer, and I don?t see horns sticking out of your head. You will return Mr. P?s property within five days.? As the gavel cracks and Burt escorts them out of the court room, Judge Judy and her musty blue panties and robe disappear through the door. After the show, Burt enters Judge Judy?s office, closes the door, embraces her and pulls her hair tightly during a long, slow, tonguing across her honor?s mahogany desk. ?Was I too harsh, Burt, darling? I couldn?t be away from you for three years. I would go mad.? ?Shut up, your honor, and put your legs over my shoulders.? ?Oh, Burt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sweet Baby Jesus!!!!!!!!!!!!? smog.blog powered by buddy V2.0 |
